何を殺さない事はあなたはもっとホモになる-- ancient japanese proverb, totally

celero-loves-dragons:

daywatch:

evilsupplyco:

So when YOU sew a bunch of unmatched parts together, it is “a quilt” and “a beautiful gift” and “will assuredly become a family heirloom” but when I sew a bunch of unmatched parts together it is “A MONSTER” and “AN ABOMINATION, AN AFFRONT TO THE GODS” and goes on “A MURDEROUS KILLING SPREE.”

Well MAYBE if you BOTHERED TO NAME HIM or I don’t know, DIDN’T BECOME DEATHLY ILL FROM THE SIGHT OF HIM MOVING we wouldn’t HAVE THIS PROBLEM

these are my parents talking to each other about me

parkarnatsu:

being a FNaF veteran is weird bc i remember everything like

  • Sparky the dog
  • Golden Freddy appearing if you input 1987 in FNaF1′s custom night
  • the great “prequel or sequel” debate of FNaF 2
  • Femangle vs MANgle
  • the photoshops everyone through were real (FNaF being real, purple guy animatronic, etc)
  • Foxy is a good guy
  • when everyone called Springtrap ‘salvage’
  • Phone guy is stuffed inside Chica
  • everyone thinking Chica was a duck
  • when teasers dropped and people analyzed the shit out of them
  • when FNaF 4 was teased for Halloween 2015, then for FNaF’s first anniversary and then just randomly dropping in July for some reason
  • Bite of ‘83 vs ‘87 in FNaF4′s Fredbear bite cutscene
  • Foxy did the Bite of ‘87
  • Bonnie’s lack of eyebrows being the biggest concern
  • The Chuck E Cheese’s comparisons
  • How to Make FNAF not Scary
  • Swiggity swoogity
  • NOTICE ME SENPAI
  • Exotic Butters being the funniest shit ever
  • the teaser trailers
  • the thank you image
  • when The Silver Eyes was announced and everyone lost their shit

fozzie:

i cant keep up with tumblr drama because new “popular text post bloggers” appear out of the ether fully fledged with 200k followers and everyone already apparently knows who they are and then 2 days later i see a callout post with information dating back 5 years as if this person didnt just pop into existence earlier in the week

fuzzynecromancer:

literallyaflame:

when i was a little kid, i didn’t care for movies. my parents always admonished me for sitting too close to the screen or fidgeting too much, so i turned to books instead. when i was four, i tried to watch the first harry potter movie. i absolutely loved it, but it wasn’t enough for me. i had to get my hands on that book. the teachers at pre-school said it was a horrible idea, but i read the first two books anyway.

then came kindergarten. the teachers scolded my parents for letting me bring novels to school. “she can’t possibly understand them,” they said. so they gave me tests on the books. i made perfect scores on all of them. i preferred books to movies and television; movies didn’t do justice to the stories i loved.

so, they marked me down as a “gifted child.” they tested my IQ and everything. i was the perfect student, in their eyes. i sat in the front and listened to the teachers as intently as i could.

one day after school, i ran up to my mother and hugged her. then, i turned my head and saw my mother walking towards me. i looked up at the woman i had hugged. “you’re not my mother,” i said, astutely.

my mother, a clever woman, thought to have my eyesight tested. turns out, i had horrible vision. somewhere around 20/450. functionally blind without glasses. not ideal for anyone, especially a six year old.

all my life until that point, people thought i must be some sort of brilliant prodigy, eschewing television and movies for more intellectual pursuits, but actually i just couldn’t fucking see lol

This took a different direction than I was expecting.

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